would you like some cheese with that whine?

Well... as far as the adoption thing goes, Becca finally e-mailed me and said that I'm to meet with her and a woman from my tribe's clan on Tuesday. Its a tiny step forward but at least its forward. The meeting is just to give a heads up as to what we're looking for and to put a little notion in the ears of the chiefs. "For extra support."...whatever that means. Hey, I'll take any support I can get.

The doctor's office still hasn't called me back about scheduling another HSG... and wouldn't you know it, I got the beginnings of another period yesterday. I think. Its a little soon... but then again, my cycles are so screwed up that "soon" means nothing. "Soon" is actually a good thing considering the fact that I've gone 6 months before without one! So I'm going to call the office when I know that the period is for sure a period.

I wonder if I'm focusing on the negative too much. Do people REALLY need to hear other peoples negative frustrations?!?! Afterall, I know people who are very negative in nature... and its usually the case that either: A) Their negativity rubs off on others and/or B) Negative things happen to them all the time! Isn't that an odd thing? So I think that instead of the usual whine and rant, I'm going to try to be a little more positive and see where that gets me. ... I bet I fall off the wagon! Ha!

I'm also trying to be a little more spiritual with this whole fertility thing...if I can ever get it off the ground. No, I'm not your typical Bible thumper (no offense to any Christians who might be reading this, but "Hyper Christians", as Ethan calls them, annoy the shit out of me.) I'm simply talking to the Creator more about this. There is a small ounce of pressure lifted off my shoulders when I put things in the Creator's hands. So Sadie Marie is going down the positive road... for who knows how long... but for now.